I watched in bewilderment the other day, when in the foyer of one building, a crazed woman tore the head off  security guard who had asked her to sign-in before she could proceed upstairs.  She unleashed an unbelievable, unwarranted, temper tantrum of great magnitude.  Having gotten her way, the woman sashayed on upstairs, self satisfaction obvious in each step, while the guard was left embarrassed and virtually cowering behind his desk.

I believe that what I witnessed that day was “bullying”.  The woman was deliberately hostile and aggressive and her actions caused pain, distress and humiliation.  A classic bully.  Statistics say that adult bullying occurs more commonly than we think.  Observation of life confirms this fact.  We are all familiar with that person who habitually victimises waiters, other service staff, colleagues at work, family members, “friends” etc.

It is one thing to assert one’s position not to sign-into a building or to insist on a good standard of service or level of work.  It’s completely unacceptable when anyone treats another like their personal punching bag.  That can never be justified and it is never right.  Such behaviour says a lot more about the bully than it does about the dawdling waiter or timid electorate.

Characteristically, bullies lack empathy for others.  They take advantage of individuals perceived as being vulnerable and they aim to gain control over their victims.  Bullies make life miserable for others, particularly those who do not conform to their way of thinking.

However, bullies can and have been known to be beaten.  Experts suggest negotiating with the bully or enlisting the help of a third party in order to prevent further bullying.  This is the more peaceful and preferred route.  Of course, the bully might be beyond reasoning with, the stubborn and arrogant sort.  In this case, former-victims are forced to rise up and fight back.  They may resort to confront the bully so as to regain their lost dignity and once more control their destiny.  And when that day of reckoning comes, the bully will stare in the face of forceful, relentless and unprecedented retaliation.

Hosni and others who have met an unceremonious exit can attest to that.

This entry was posted on February 14th, 2011 at 1:49 pm by Thandi Mpofu and is filed under Reflections, Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.