On men & mini-skirts
Thursday, November 24th, 2011 by Amanda AtwoodOn Tuesday, Varaidzo blogged about the sexual harassment she witnessed on her way to work on one morning, when she saw a woman in a mini-skirt being tormented by a heckling mob.
We shared this in our email newsletter this week, and received a number of comments from readers about the post – some more sympathetic than others.
We welcome your comments on the original blog, or on the responses below.
I miss home so much but sometimes being away from all that madness is a good break. I was that girl a few years ago, I remember feeling so terrified as they shook the kombi back and forth thnking they would overturn it. I a full figured, beautiful african woman. I respect myself and those around me. What I wear should be a choice I am allowed to make and live with. If I am comfortable in it why not? The man I date absolutely adores that I dress that way. I am based in Cape Town now and those are some of the little priviledges that I wish I could have back home. The freedom to dress as I please without being named a whore, the freedom to go to a party or a bar for a few drinks with the girls without the men around thinking that I want to be picked up or that I am a prostitute. I am an educated, independant and empowered woman who hopes that one day those men will gain those qualities too. I wish I could attend the march against rape, but they have my support in sisterhood.
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This should stop i remember in the day women had a march in mini skirts and its time we did that again. Actually lets face it if Zimbabwe had a beach like Moz, Durban and Cape Town- will these men be disgusted? Why is it that the men who go to the beach do not ‘attack’ sun bathers are they more civalised than these landlocked’animals. No women do not desrve to be treated like this, afterall most of these women come from homes where their parents( including fathers), husbands and male figures allow them to go out. We need to publise and arrest men who dehumanise women’s bodies and esteem the DV Act surely has a clause, it is like being arrested when mob attacks a victim its time we start seesing arrests.
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I am very much disgruntled by such unruly behaviour. That is barbaric. I feel the long arm of the law should deal with ths hooligans. These are potential rapists. I am a man myself but it realy hurts me. Imagine if that was yo own sista. How would you feel. ZRP should wake up and do something with these rowdy people.
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This is the new world we’re living in . I was not at the scene but I can assure you that most of those men who were hackling the woman are not ‘very ‘educated-they miss the softening influences of morden civilisation. Thats exactly the kind of women we want in our streets-women who know that they are women. We are not from the Arab world so its not a crime to dress the way you like as long as you feel good about it.
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Yes males respond to visual stimuli and we are meant to either court if you like and leave if you don’t. I you like and you know you have NO chance of getting lucky, dont hurl abuse at her or even worse, abuse her physically. I reckon deep down thse chaps like what they see!
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Its ok for women 2 dress comfortably especially in these high temperatures .However there is a line to be drawn ,some dressing leave a lot to be desired,obviously vultures will pounce on such women.I’m also a man,a woman who dresses scantily will obviously attract the opposite sex.Women should dress scantily in their homes not outdoors.
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This hypocritical attitude by men makes me very cross because it is simply not true to tradition. I am old enough to remember what people wore as traditional clothes. I saw them with my own eyes.
In Mashonaland I saw women with narrow flaps of animal skin in the front and at the back that were tied to a string around the waist. Except for the inner part of the thighs there was no covering of the legs from waist to ankle. Admittedly, the flaps of animal skin reached to the knees, but the larger portions of the thighs and buttocks were completely open to view. Women wore nothing on top except a string or two of beads.
In Manicaland, near the Umvumvumvu Bridge, I remember seeing a young woman in about 1961 striding up the main highway as though she owned the universe. She was magnificent! All she was wearing was a miniskirt of knotted inner bark from a tree. I believe that was probably traditional dress for her area, although I don’t know for certain.
I think this persecution of women over clothing styles is fueled by men’s emotional fear of women’s female power. It has no logical reason behind it apart from the desire to control women and prevent us from realising what enormous power we have. Without women there is no life!. This desire is not confined to black males, but is expressed differently in other cultures e.g. lower rates of pay for the same work.
However, having said that, I think it is sensible to protect oneself by wearing less revealing clothes. Keep the miniskirts and tight trousers for home consumption. It’s not really so difficult. In Arab countries they wear their beautiful clothes under their burkas.
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Zimbabwean men need to WAKE UP and move with the times. This lady was not trying to sell herself to the highest bidder, but wearing what she felt comfotable in and what she wanted to. I’m sure many of the men that were insulting this lady were in fact ogling/admiring her. What about the ‘big bellied’ men wearing baggy, hanging trousers, vests and sandals – now that is disgusting to women, but they never pass comments or insults. Wake up Zimbabwean Men!!
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I think there are things we simply have to treasure. Mahomed Ali once told his daughters that, u never find gold or rubies strawn on the surface, u have to dig deep underground to find the gold. A preacher once said, yo man must find something on you that he is proud of saying, it it only me who has ever seen this. Ladies, lets just be dignified and cover what has to be covered.
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I failed to get the gist of Varaidzo’s narrative on the dress issue.I think sometimes women take their freedom & rights too far or for granted. Women are their worst enemy, as much as we understand their quest for liberty and empowerment,what does nakedness or semi-nakedness got to do with the upliftment of women? We all understand that women have been marginalised but i think it’s stupid really to show us your buttocks and underwear in the same vein. Going the Britney Spears route is a disgrace.Let’s have demarcations on making our voices heard and misinterpretation of western modernity.Imagine men marching with their corks exposed to protest against male ircumcision,fine,we could have got the world’s attention but what about our image as a people.I will definitely support any woman fighting against partriachy but they don’t have to show me their buttocks for me to take them seriously,only the dignity with which they do it will do the trick.
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My sister Varaidzo has a point but in putting it accross had a bias and an element on her tone of demeaning men as barbaric yet it was a sample of few cultural conserved group. To this end, her article become offending to us men. The similar event also happened when i was travelling from Harare to Mutare, I had a stop over in Marondera and I saw a group of women with very few young boys shouting and calling all sorts of names to a lady who was in a min-skirt. I then out of curiosity asked some of the ladies who were doing that why they were doing what they were doing to a lady like them? They said it was all wrong for her to wear such a mini-skirt and was an embarrassment to women hood. Against this backdrop, Sister Varaidzo your tone stigmatised men as unreasonable people and as such your article can not go unchallenged. You took a paralysis of analysis of that event. The fact that she was rescued by a man shows that not all men would love to see ladies harrassed or embrassed because of their choices and taste. Again not all men are enticed by body exposure of ladies.
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I find it so repulsively shameful how the men of this nation behave and perceive women who are liberal enough to exercise their democratic right. Do we have to stage a protest like the one the South African women staged a few years back, clad in mini-skirts so as to shame the men into respecting us?
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Its unfortunate that such events still happen even when woman are aware that some areas are just a no no zone when some what half dressed. I dont blame the blunt crowd. Some woman just offend public decency. Wearing fabrics that they know surely heads will turn. However we cant change society (men) over this behaviour. Because even when you dress nicely and one passer by decides to comment and you dont answer hell can break loose. My advice go to lower density areas when you feel that short skirt is what you are feeling today.leave the other folks to the longs.
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Thanks for the enlightening expose about the way men/women treat women in everyday life. It however, provoked a wild thought about sexual harassment, a term usually used by men and women to highlight harassment of women by men. When and how are men harassed by females? If a man comments about the way a woman is dressed or her body structure it is taken as sexual harassment. But men are daily harassed sexually by women intentionally exhibiting their beautiful bodies in public places. Women boast that if they want something from a man they simply have to show off as much of their legs as possible. Ask taxi drivers, driving licence inspectors, police officers and they can tell you lots of stories of how women use their structure to get bargains. Have you ever seen a prostitute wearing a nun’s attire to solicit? They harass men by putting on mini skirts, scant clothing, etc. So when a woman appears in public scantily clothed, men are obviously harassed and they should be protected against sexual harassment. I am not saying that women should not be allowed to wear whatever they want. But they must in the process know that some men become provoked. No man is sexually provoked when he sees a mother nursing a baby. But when a woman exposes her breasts, then some men are sexually harassed. During the 16 days of gender activism, both sexes should be made aware about what sexual harassment entails, lest we keep bashing innocent people.