I see there is a lot of heat concerning the questionable “spending habits” of the Prime Minister, Finance Minister and other senior MDC officials in government and how they are abusing public funds. And heck, they are being investigated by “the law,” and they well could find themselves behind bars where they previously have been guests and would no doubt not relish a night at Matapi!

While of course one cannot afford the luxury of ignoring politicians bloating their faces with money meant for the poor, building humongous manors when across the road are hovels housing dirt poor families, or travelling by air first class when the ordinary Jack has to travel in those ramshackle death-traps called long distance buses they already know will falter, veer off the road and plunge into a ditch, one still has to question this rather apocryphal due diligence of the public defenders who have taken these coalition partners to task about how they are spending public funds. And this is in a country where we have folks who have been in government for barely three years being investigated for alleged fiscal malfeasance when we have men and women who have been at it for three decades exhibiting an indefatigable streak of kleptocracy still holding their heads high and with no lawman daring to throw the book at them.

That is why it has been fairly easy for MDC officials and supporters to dismiss the investigations on the USD1,5 million for the PM’s house and the foreign trips of the FM’s staffers as part of a grand plot that no doubt will unravel as we head for the next polls. We are obviously watching closely how this will pan out, yet I can see a flood of “sympathy votes” in the offing! But it is something to imagine how resources to investigate the abuse of government resources have never been diligently spread to challenge over the decades on anything from the 85 percent disability gratuity claims by men and women who “died for the country” but still walk the earth, housing funds meant for poor civil servants looted without batting an eyelid, tender scams from as far back as the 1980s that remain unpunished, the bankrupting of Roger Boka – we could go on and on and on, but then the hypocrisy of the founding fathers has become legendary. Remember the old man frothing about corrupt colleagues and threatening the wrath of the gods on offenders long before anyone imagined he rule “his Zimbabwe” with anyone? We are not asking that these people not be investigated, we are asking that there be consistency.

Great ain’t it?

Kenny Road runs from Avondale Shops on King George Road west to Kensington shops on Connaught Road. A street of suburban homes between two choice shopping and community centres.

Along this road, people have converted two houses (with a swimming pool) into restaurants and bars. They are ‘Actor Café’, at 7 Kenny Road, and next door ‘Number 9 Pub and Restaurant’. You can see the houses behind hedges, and they are well advertised on the street, so they are easy to find. However, they are illegal.

In October 2006, number 7 applied for a license as a ‘meeting house’. Council refused (meeting of the Environment Management Sub-Committee of the City Council, on 31 October 2006, Item 27 of the minutes) for the following reasons. 1) a site inspection revealed that a restaurant was already being run there! 2) the residents were opposed.

A restaurant is legally a ‘shop’, and this area is not zoned for commercial activity. So commercial activity already prohibited, aside from the fact that they had set up and were running an illegal entity before they even applied. Not to mention they applied for a licence as a ‘meeting place’ when they obviously fully intended to keep running a restaurant.

The first letter in my possession, dated 22 November 2006, reads; To; Mr. Mange He Ho, 7 Kenny Road. From; Psychology Chiwanga, Director of Urban Planning Services, City of Harare. Re; (7 Kenny Road), Avondale, says – there was a meeting to consider the application and it was refused for two reasons.

So, proper procedure had been followed, proper notice given, everything completely open and transparent. We all know it is not to be.

The second letter in my possession is from the Kenny Road residents to Mrs. Vhutuza, Urban Planning, City of Harare, dated 9 July 2009. It complains that nothing has been done. The residents are aware it is illegal, and yet the restaurants are quiet clearly there, and making a lot of noise as they expected (reason for objecting to it in the first place, three years ago).

So the city responds, 28 July 2009. Again, from Psychology Chiwanga, Director of Urban Planning Services, City of Harare. He points out that inspections were carried out, 13 July 2009, and indeed, these revealed both properties had been turned into restaurants, without approval.

Not only without approval, but he takes care to point out that approval could never be given! They are in ‘Residential Zone 1A(i)’, where commercial use is prohibited. And they fall into a zone where a Blanket Enforcement Order has already been issued (and published in the press).

Copies of this letter were sent, for appropriate action to be taken, to:

Secretary, Liquor Licensing Board
Officer in Charge, ZRP Avondale
Director of Health Services

Now, in August 2010, it is all thrust at me! In my wanderings in my area, I can clearly see that the restaurants are open and advertising. Taking in customers. Doing ‘normal’ business, quite openly and dishonestly.

To start, we have one restaurant (two now) operating for, at least, four years. They applied for a license (not even the correct one) when they were already operating as a restaurant, in 2006, and were refused (as the law requires).

So they have been operating illegally, taking in money and one assumes not paying tax etc, for at least four years.

The authorities (Police, City, Liquor Licensing, Health) are aware of it, have investigated it and seen it to be illegal, have communicated with each other on it’s illegality, and have done nothing. For four years!

Is Zimbabwe a country where the rule of law prevails? Certainly not in this case. It is illegal in terms of health. It is illegal in terms of zoning and use. It is illegal in terms of license (several – Liquor, Restaurant/Tourism tax, probably more). Do the police know of this and stop it? Yes and no.

I see Theresa Makoni, Co-Minister of Home Affairs, is reported to have made recent remarks, “the police are now executing their duties professionally”. Is this what constitutes “professionalism” in her opinion? There has been letters sent (does the post office not work?) by one authority to another. Can one authority not write? Or another not read? We assume they can, therefore the information must have been passed. Yet, quite obviously, the law is being broken, and nothing is being done.

While this might be the neighbours’ problem – they suffer from the loud noise until sun up, parking in the street, a security problem, etc., What about all the rest of us? We have a Health Ministry that really does not care about Health. Or they would not let an unlicensed establishment operate. We have a Liquor Board that does not care if, or who, alcohol is sold to. Aside from the loss of revenue – which they would not get as it can never be licensed – they have no control of what is actually happening. We have a municipality, with it’s own police force (for which they are constantly asking to be given power of arrest), that will maybe clamp your car for not paying the parking meter, but will allow two restaurants to run (taking in a LOT more money than a parking ticket) for four years!

And the common people on the street? Who pays taxes, is supposed to respect the authority of the people in uniform, upholds the laws of Zimbabwe as they are written and decided in parliament? Well, you are getting taken for a ride. You are being abused. You are being horribly wronged. For everyone who pays their tourism tax – stop doing it! There is obviously no need. We have the real life example of establishments, who do not ‘appear’, getting away with it for four years. Everyone who applies for and gets licenses, and pays their regular license fees – don’t do it! There is no need! People get away with it for four years. The people who drive on the left hand side of the road – don’t bother. It may be ‘the law’ but who cares? People break the law for four years (in a big way, it is difficult to hide two houses, and they advertise!) and no one arrests them.

The rumour is (and it is a rumour, there is no evidence at all), they are paying someone ‘powerful’ / in government / influential, etc. Well, whoever they are paying, he (or she) should be in jail. Aside from the fact that they are stealing our money (you and I pay taxes in an open and honest manner, that goes into a public purse, while ‘others’ make a living without anything going back to the public purse, so we are asked to pay more taxes), he/she giving us a health risk, aiding the misuse of alcohol, (very possibly increasing the AIDS epidemic), destroying the authority of the police (and other uniformed services by extension), and more ramifications that their pocket (which gets bigger everyday) is not concerned about. They are selling your soul/health/good life/education/safety for their personal gain.

But that is okay; it is only the neighbours problem.

The ongoing battle for the control and ownership of church assets between the two factions of the Anglican church in Zimbabwe continue with the faction belonging to Bishop Nobert  Kunonga claiming total control of church assets after a High Court ruling. The battles, which led to the arrest of church members belonging to Anglican Church of the Province of Central Africa (ACPCA) faction led by Rt Revd Chad Nicholas Gandiyah began when Bishop Nobert Kunonga was sacked by the Anglican Church of the Province of Central Africa (ACPCA) in 2008.

The recent court ruling gave custodianship of Anglican Church properties to excommunicated bishop Dr Nobert Kunonga, a move that will result in many Anglican parishioners continuing to worship in the open. Despite the fact that the excommunicated Bishop formed a rival church he still occupies many Anglican churches in the country while enjoying the backing of the police. A recent crackdown by Bishop Kunonga has resulted in churchgoers getting injured, arrested and priests getting evicted from their homes in Harare.

After getting tired of praying with one eye open and always on the run from the police, members of ACPCA in Chitungwiza have decided to put their funds together and have purchased a stand from the council. Only time will tell whether Bishop Kunonga will pay an unwelcome visit to this new site and kick these brave worshippers out of their tent.

Zimbabwe Government rethinks South African GMO chicken imports ban. Government rethinks left-hand vehicle ban. Government rethinks second-hand car import. Government rethinks beer ban. Government rethinks plastic bags ban. Government rethinks mining law. Government rethinks indigenisation Bill. Government bans trousers in parliament. Government rethinks trouser ban after female MPs threaten to bare all. Zimbabwe joins Malawi, bans farting. Government rethinks stinking law. Government bans laughing at presidential portrait. Government rethinks funny bone ban. Government bans sex in dark places. Government sees the light, rethinks sex ban. Government bans sex work. Government rethinks sex ban, minister says okay to have sex while working. Agriculture production slumps. Government rethinks violent land-grab. [Well, that’s pushing it.] Mugabe rethinks GNU, so does everybody! Government rethinks condom ban in schools. Minister says sex is basic human right, even for students. Government outdoes itself, rethinks thinking.

Plato wrote that a better world can become a reality only if it is ruled by philosopher kings, in other words people who think. Thinkers as it were. Curiously, in Zimbabwe rethinkers come aplenty, and we all know where that has got us!

Heroes Day holiday

It is Heroes Day holiday,
To commemorate those
Who put their country first
And thought nothing of themselves.

It is Heroes Day holiday,
Beer-halls are packed to bursting,
Beer mugs and bottles are dancing in hands
As carousers drink beyond drinking.

It is Heroes Day holiday,
Some have already paired off illicitly,
The bush is on fire – some in dongas, others in cars
As they exchange STDs in the false name of love.

It is Heroes Day holiday,
The rich and powerful
Dance their intrigue games round braais
As they weave new plans for the next plunder.

It is Heroes Day holiday,
The whole nation is awash with joy,
Somewhere, worms are feeding on the heroes,
The heroes’ families are in deep mourning.

It is Heroes Day holiday, is it?

- Chirikure Chirikure

Written in 1989

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